feathers flying on rainy days.

Crushed. February 15, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jeannelle @ 5:50 pm

and I told her to give up on her dream cause it’s never coming true. The one she so often speaks of yet won’t admit to. She ignored me – too distracted by the colours illuminating her face. I tried to make her understand how a child feels upon losing his beloved blankie; and go there. She wouldn’t even look at me – too distracted by the shade of blue that was her jeans. I told her it was impossible and she simply talked over me about the song playing on the radio.

Just like a preteen grasps to his first crush after the initial rejection; she refused to acknowledge my words. My words that would force her to give up the dream. A dream so silly it belongs in a world where we are all perfect and love never hurts.

-What she doesn’t know- I have the very same dream and have been telling myself to let go for years. And yet it’s so much easier to think about that song playing on the radio.

She didn’t let go.

 

Just over a year ago this sacrifice took place and still no freedom. February 7, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jeannelle @ 8:13 pm

And you can try to wash it away, but no water is holy enough for such a task. Bathe us in your glory but I promise you peace will not come. We will drown in the misery. A sacrifice to God. A sacrifice for pain and for the world’s lack of love. On the day of our rebirth, then and only then will I rejoice. I will fall to my knees and thank the lord for our safe return. But for now there is no joy. no freedom. Only gasping for air while choking on the anguish.

When our eyes reopen we will finally be, free at last.

 

cliche.

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jeannelle @ 8:09 pm

sometimes I wish love was like the movies.
I wish you’d open your eyes and realize
-everything you’ve ever wanted has been standing right here.
for years.